Totally Subjective Gaming Review: Braid

Let's see, checklist for the perfect Kate game:

Features little round people as main characters? Check.
Beautiful, spare orchestral score? Check.
Gorgeous visuals? Check.
Time travel? Check.
Priced under $20? Check.

Okay then. I guess we're done here.

Braid is a new game available on the Xbox Arcade. If you wanna know more about the game developers and crap, look at some real reviews. I don't know about that stuff. I DO know that this game is fantastic. It's tough to describe, but imagine if Mario was a guy pushing 30 who realizes he let the Princess get away. That's basically the story - about a guy piecing together why his relationship fell apart. The only thing he can do, aside from jump and walk, is go back in time and try to fix his mistakes.

So even though it looks like a normal platform crawler, it's actually a puzzle game. Even with the ability to go back in time, it is still a bit tricky. Especially if, like me, you're not so good at jumping on top of things. As a result, I've only played a couple of the worlds at this point. According to Kotaku, a real gamer would probably be able to get through the whole thing in six hours. Yeah. I kind of suck.

The only thing I'd warn you about is that the story is melancholy. As I said, it's all about thinking back on your failed relationships. So, maybe you might want to think about that if, say, you're currently, oh, I dunno, coming to grips with your impending divorce. Yeah. Hits a little close to home. Ahem. Moving on.

So go buy it! Now now now! This is a great deal on a great game and in six months when all your hipster friends are talking about it, you wanna be able to say you played it first.

Totally subjective review rating: Flawless Victory.