Please, just... no.

I was hoping I would never have to address this issue. But things have gone too far. This needs to stop.

Why, why, WHY are they making a Dragonball Z movie? WHYYYYY? And live action to boot!

There's just so many things wrong with this concept. Didn't anyone learn from Speed Racer? Dragonball Z is just a bunch of guys yelling and leaping through the air with energy lines behind their heads.

Don't get me wrong, I devoted HOURS to watching the show. It got the the point where I could tell within seconds of turning on the TV whether I had seen the episode or not. Which is saying something, because at least 63%* of every episode was made up of Gohan/Goku/Piccolo/Frieza/Cell powering up their special attack. There's only so many ways you can animate someone at the epicenter of an energy attack.

Anyway, the plot is incomprehensible. Not to say that I couldn't explain it at one point, because I watched several seasons. But making a movie-length version is just misguided. And a live-action version?!? COME ON. Not to even get INTO the issue that the people playing Goku and Bulma aren't even, you know, Asian. I just... AARRRGGHH! KATE SMASH!

And I really don't want to see James Marsters debase himself as Piccolo. I like him! His gay-off with Captain Jack in Torchwood was the highlight of season 2! How could he DO this to himself?

Oh, right... the money.

*22% was devoted to the attack itself, and the rest of the show was devoted to the aftermath/Goku eating noodles.

And here I was thinking I'd never get a date.

Well, there's always Drakmar:

I guess this is a documentary of some sort, following a 14-year old uber-nerd. His nerd weapon of choice is medieval re-enactment. Ah yes, a classic choice. Well done.

P.S. I have not actually watched any of the documentary, other than the clip above, because why in hell would I want to relive the most painful years of teenage geekdom? Gah! No thanks.

Now you too can worship an idol.

Oh, etsy. You make it so easy to find fun crap to buy. Like this Flying Spaghetti Monster ornament. You know, if you want to have a graven idol of an ancient* Geek God.

Image courtesy of Livinginthepast.

*ancient = more than two months old on teh interwebs.

I read a book!

I don't know about you, but I've become pretty picky about my choices in reading material as I become an older, more sophisticated nerd. Remember when you were 12? You'd read any old crap from the scifi/fantasy section of Waldenbooks, especially if there was some green chick with cleavage on the cover. I must have had a dozen books just by Piers Anthony alone. Not to mention the whole Weis/Hickman saga (I was a Raistlin Majere fan, I'll admit. I'm not ashamed. I was 12, for God's sake.)

But once I grew up, and I'm guessing this is true for you all too, it became harder to find the good stuff. I don't have tons of time or disposable income to spend on books anymore. If I buy a book, or get one out of the library, I want to be able to finish it, at least. I don't want to throw it across the room in disgust before the second chapter is out.

I mean, yeah, there's always Pratchett, and he's great, but sometimes you want something a little more serious and gripping. Which is why I was happy to find The Name of the Wind, by Patrick Rothfuss. I read it over my vacation this summer, and it was really good. Just a solid, well crafted fantasy novel. The protagonist is a fully fleshed character, the plot is exciting, the history/world is well thought out, basically everything you'd want in a good fantasy.

I'm pointing this out because it's the first in the series, so there may not be as much hype as other authors yet. It's easy to overlook a single title on the fantasy bookshelf, when everything else is at least a trilogy. Also, the cover art is terrible. It looks like a vampire/native american/goth romance novel. Guh. It does nothing to sell the book.

Anyway, go out and buy/borrow it. I highly recommend it, if that means anything to you (NEWS FLASH: Random blogger likes book! Stampedes of fans mob local Barnes and Noble!)

Anyway, it's over 700 pages, so block out some time. I'm looking forward to re-reading it when I have some time to really devote to it. And keep your eye out for the sequel. Should be good.

Maybe I just have bad taste

I just read on io9 that David Twohy is trying to make two sequels to Chronicles of Riddick. Okay, so for me, that is good news, because I loved that movie. I thought it was just great. What can I say, I'm a sucker for Karl Urban in a fancy helmet, I guess.

But not a lot of other people feel that way, apparently. It got a 30% on Rotten Tomatoes, and even the "good" reviews basically said that the movie was dumb. So I never bothered to see it in the theaters, and only found out I liked it when it started showing on TV.

This happens to me a lot. I read reviews, just like everyone else, and if a review is shitty, I don't go to see the movie. But I'm starting to think there should be a different set of critics for sci-fi movies or something. I've watched tons of movies that got lukewarm reviews, or were outright panned, and I liked them just fine. Time Machine, Aeon Flux, Constantine, Blade Trinity... I thought all of these movies were enjoyable. Maybe not the best movies ever, but definitely worthy of a Sunday matinee, at least.

So I was happy to see a lot of the comments on io9 for the Riddick thing were from people who also liked the movie.* I mean, I can totally be fine with having crappy taste in movies. That's okay with me. I'm just not convinced that all of these movies I like are genuinely bad. It seems like movies in other genres, like comedy, get a pass for a stupid premise or a crappy script as long as the comic timing is good. Case in point: Zoolander, Dodgeball, Anchorman. Don't get me wrong, I love these movies.Hi-larious.

But a crappy sci-fi script, even with the most utterly awe-inspiring effects ever to sear themselves on to your eyeballs, is still dismissed as not having any substance. Huh? Isn't awesome special effects and amazing sets and costumes the reason we go to see these movies? I mean, I didn't watch Dodgeball because I wanted to experience the agony of being an underdog - I saw it because Ben Stiller looks funny in that wig. And apparently, that was enough for critics to praise it as goofy fun. But Chronicles of Riddick, which in the words on of io9 commenter was "the best Dune since Dune," (no argument there!), is dismissed as goofy fun.

I don't get it. I know, let's make up a conspiracy theory about it. Yeah!


*Before devolving into the inevitable squabble over which was better, Chronicles or Pitch Black. Sigh. Nerds.

History + Webcomics + Canada = AWESOME.

Okay, if you haven't already discovered the total awesomeness that is Kate Beaton, you are really missing out:


I'm sorry, but writing webcomics about historical events is just plain funny. It just is. Go to her site because they are all great. Also, she has a Livejournal account, where she also does comics about her life. Just go and bask in the delicious Canadianess of it all. I love it.

I demand Playstation cease blowing my mind with these games.

Cease and desist, I say!

I like you, whoever you are.

I parked behind this car in Saratoga this morning.

That makes me happy.

Must get PSP NOW!

I MUST HAVE THIS GAME:




Why is this only for PSP? Oh, the humanity!

In honor of my impending Aunthood

So, I figure, I'm gonna be an Aunt in a matter of hours. Yes. My sister-in-law is about to have a baby. Time to start outfitting her appropriately. Luckily, we have Etsy:

Here's Teedious' Etsy shop, for more info. In the meantime, let's all get ready for baby Julia!